the beautiful promise

Open facebook today, other than being bombarded with a list of getting-to-know-me results my friends have been taking, I noticed the panel on the right filled were 3 newly minted couples posting various wedding pictures. I briefly went through their pictures, just too many pictures for me to go through it one by one. Welcome to my age where being single is the odd one out. I’ve just attended a wedding dinner last week and there is another one coming along this weekend. So I foresee another 2 wedding albums that will be appearing soon.

Happy to see them all in bliss but my view of getting married right now is mixed. Amidst of this misty happiness while shrouded with beautiful promises of till death do us part, I know there is more than meets the eyes when it comes to life after marriage. How life can be different where things you expect to change will not change while things you don’t expect to change will changed. The union of 2 people is not child’s play but also a union of 2 families together, union of differing backgrounds, values and understanding of life and this is probably where all problems will come in. This moment now I’m not willing to face it, perhaps not having the courage to go through it all by myself.

Then I saw another friend whose boyfriend went down on bended knee while holidaying. Heart melts. I think getting engaged while on holiday is a very nice thought. While you’re enjoying every moment that you’re spending with him and then suddenly the ring pops out, it’s like a cherry on top of the ice cream (although I dislike eating cherry). Anyway, I know this friend for a while, not very close but I know she has been in love to this guy for many years. The relationship is like a boat on a stormy sea, according to some sources but she treats him with all the patience she has. Finally the moment of fairy tale has arrived and in style. I guess right now nothing else can put that huge smile on her face seeing the spark coming off from her hand every now and then relishing the sweetness she experienced in Italy.

I know of another friend who is also planning to propose in the coming Europe tour. I wonder if the plan is still valid now.

post 2nd year anniversary

The weather lately is boiling hot. Air is still as the wind chimes stop knocking against each other. If BF is here with me now, most certainly he will be bathing in sweat now. Lucky for him he is probably in some outlet enjoying the cool breeze of air thanks to modern technology.

Nothing much happened yesterday night, after my salsa class, I headed for home. I tried to strike a conversation on the phone to spend time chatting since we can’t see each other to compensate for the lack of his presence on our anniversary but somehow we ended up arguing. Sigh, not again?!

In the end we didn’t talk much, both headed to our own bed, to sleep away the weariness accumulated from the day. The recipe for disappointment is hoping too much and I think yesterday that is exactly what I was cooking for myself. Note to self, don’t hope too much and don’t build up too much fantasy to a relationship unless you’re into gay relationship.

Hmm… I wonder how couples survive their anniversary date.

no dinner, no flower

It’s our 2nd year anniversary today. The day we officially go out on our big green light. How time flies. From the time I agreed to be his GF over the phone, till now, so much has happened. All the different taste in life, I’ve tasted it all within these 2 years. Although I should expect more to come but I really hope to just taste the sweetness in this relationship. It’s like when eating in a buffet; I will happily skip through the main and dive straight to dessert corner.

The feeling now is sad because there is nothing to expect on today. Since each of us will be busy and we’re still far apart. Actually every now and then I still ask myself when this far apart thing is going to end. Sigh, hate this feeling. Well I hate long distance relationship, in short.

Tonight, there will be no dinner nor flower but BF mentioned that he will plan a trip together to Bali next month. Hopefully the trip will work out well. *finger cross*

bills, bills, bills

Although this blog is essentially used to blog about my relationship with BF but today I feel blogging about something else. This is something about someone I am currently living under one roof with. Don’t get me wrong, this person is not someone related to me in anyway other than we used to be classmates when we were young, now turned housemate.

As I don’t have any other source to vent my anger anonymously, I figured this is the best way for me to spit it all out without hurting anyone in the process. So the story goes this way, I have 3 person staying in my house now. Lately one of my housemates has moves out. He used to be the person in charge of paying off the bills and such. While myself, I’ve always been the one making sure the rent is paid on time to the owner. I made sure that my part is done on time each time. Now this housemate has moved out, quite expectedly his load becomes a shared load between me and the other guy.

So here is the problem, 3 bills have arrived and to these days he has yet to pay anything. I’ve asked him a few times to the extent that I feel embarrassed asking him. I don’t want to appear like a little boss around the house but neither do I want to live in fear knowing that I will be living in the dark when I come home one day. He still has the cheek to call me a “PARANOID android”, that’s the angriest part but hello, do you think I really want to bug you over nitty-gritty stuff like this? You think I’ve nothing better to do?

Now I’m not sure whether I should write him an email to tell him off nicely or I should just leave the bill on the table, any idea?

On the bright side, things have been smooth sailing for me and BF for the last couple of days. No quarrels, no shouting, no slamming down the phone. I hope this situation will persist. BF is likely to be sleeping now as he has been rather exhausted the past few weeks due to waking up early for meetings. Hope he will feel refreshed tomorrow. *wink*